Tuesday, September 30, 2003


Play with this. A beautiful image database. Inspiring.

Lynn and I were discussing critical thinking late last night. It's amazing how many people who blog just put in links to things like Robert Palmer's death (yes, those sad emoticons so sum up your feelings about that two-hit wonder, I'm sure) and articles they've read and seen. I'm certainly guilty of that, but on occasion, I post about things I like or dislike and most importantly, I'd like to think I know why I feel a certain way about things.

My solution is this. Market a Dummies book about Critical Thinking. The Dummies Guide To Critical Thought won't make you Noam Chomsky or even Roger Ebert, but you'll be able to relate ideas more clearly to people without making them feel personally insulted because you fucking hate their work. You can say "I fucking hate your work because your ideas are scattershot with a lack of cohesion and no throughline. But the bit with the puppy was quite good."

First person who'd get a copy would be Augie over at Comic Book Resources, who once decided he wasn't going to read a comic because the lettering bothered him.

Monday, September 29, 2003



I think I'll go visit Little Joe soon. Let him know I think he should look at arming himself if he wants to keep attempting escapes from the Franklin Park Zoo.

He may be a bitch, but Ishkur's guide to Electronic Music is most satisfying. Check out this rather brutal tidbit on J-Pop:

I mean, I'm sure the culture is swell once you get past the incest and pedophelia and giant robots and all, but after that -- huh? Japan is super crazy place, 100 PERCENT!

No, it's not at all politically correct and there's moments where he disses records I like, but I really admire the fact that he seems to truly love electronic music while smacking it around like the bitch it can be. (I'm sure that comes off as me being the sort of guy who masturbates to the latest Lifetime movie featuring a woman being clobbered by Mark Harmon or whoever's playing her husband.)

Buy some of Kathy's spooky stuff. She's not Goth, but she plays one on TV.

Friday, September 26, 2003


George Plimpton is dead.

Author John Updike, an old friend of Plimpton's, said: "My goodness, he was so vital, full of fun."

Plimpton died on Thursday at his home in Manhattan, New York, friend Elaine Kaufman said.


I'll have a glass of scotch for you tonight, and perhaps reread On The Road. You'll be missed. Someone unafraid to be intellectual about the mundane and accessible.

Thursday, September 25, 2003


Buy My RM1X, Suckers! Remix! Sequence! I'm selling my blue box. You need it.

Kevin Does A Stupid Internet Thing

1. What is your Full Name: Kevin Jon Church
2. What color trousers are you wearing right now? Khakis
3. What are you listening to right now: Gav talking about the sex he had
with his ex last night.
4. What are the last 2 digits of your phone number: 18
5. What was the last thing you ate: Super Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with
Peanut Butter
6. If you were a crayon what color would you be: Cornflower Blue
7. How is the weather right now: Loverly.
8. Last person you talked to on the phone: Tom DeLucia
9. First thing you notice about the opposite sex: Face.
10. Are you hungry right now: No.
11. How are you today: Eh.
12. Favorite Drink: Beer.
13. Favorite Alcoholic drink: More beer.
14. Favorite Sports: Women's Soccer
15. Hair Color: Black with bits of grey creeping in.
16. Eye Color: Green
17. Do you wear contacts: Nope.
18. Siblings: 1 Brother, 14 years older.
19. Favorite Month: September
20. Favorite Food: General Gau's Chicken
21. Last Movie you Watched: Shaolin Soccer
22. Favorite Day of the Year: Labor Day.
23. Are you too shy to ask someone out: No.
24. Summer or Winter: Winter.
25. Hugs or Kisses?: Kisses.
26. Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate.
27. Do you want your friends to write back: What friends?
28. Who is most likely to fill this survey out: Everyone before me.
29. Who is least likely to fill this survey out: Kari
30. Living Arrangements: Kristin's my housemate cum life partner.
31. What books are you reading: Alan Moore's SWAMP THING, LITTLE GREEN MEN
by Christopher Buckley.
32. What's on your mouse pad: A mouse.
33. Favorite Board Game: Trivial Pursuit
34. What did you do last night: Watched a comedy DVD. Read.
Made dinner with K.
35. Favorite Smells: Apple pie. Cheese.
36. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: No.
37. What inspires you? The city. Alan Moore's writing. Insane chinese cinema.
39. Favorite Flower: Roses.
40. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning:
"That hooker is starting to stink."

Wednesday, September 24, 2003


Interviewer: So will Underworld go on and on like the Rolling Stones?

"On and on" says Karl, "but not like the Rolling Stones - we hope. Not in our wildest dreams. I always thought it would be a giggle to be really old wrinkled blokes doing old wrinkly bloke music, and not trying to be seventeen again.

"I don't want to pretend to be Karl in his 40's or Karl in his 30's when i'm in my 50's and 60's and 70's. But i think it'll be such a laugh making music and doing live stuff in our 80's. The relative lack of ageism in the dance scene is really quite welcome."

Yannick's put up samples from the "Born Slippy 2003" single. Rick's Down Ambient mix will bliss you out.

It rained very, very hard yesterday. Afterwards, the sky was beautiful.





The buildings, they look down on you.





Russia, 1964. Admire the buildings, citizens, for we are winning the space race! (OK, no, really, that's Boston, 2003, but...c'mon.)


A few moments ago, I ran into Claire. Claire's a fetching girl, very toothsome and gregarious. I like her quite a bit. She's an actress.

Today, she's wearing an old-timey dress and taking people on a tour of the city.

I really hope she gets a better gig soon.

Tuesday, September 23, 2003


I done got told which candidate I should be votin' fer.

1. Dean, Gov. Howard, VT - Democrat (100%)
2. Moseley-Braun, Former Senator Carol IL - Democrat (94%)
3. Kucinich, Cong. Dennis, OH - Democrat (91%)
4. Edwards, Senator John, NC - Democrat (83%)
5. Kerry, Senator John, MA - Democrat (81%)
6. Graham, Senator Bob, FL - Democrat (79%)
7. Gephardt, Cong. Dick, MO - Democrat (78%)
8. Clark, Retired Army General Wesley K "Wes" Arkansas - Democrat (77%)
9. Sharpton, Reverend Al - Democrat (74%)
10. Lieberman Senator Joe CT - Democrat (67%)
11. LaRouche, Lyndon H. Jr. - Democrat (65%)
12. Libertarian Candidate (46%)
13. Phillips, Howard - Constitution (3%)
14. Bush, George W. - US President (1%)

Monday, September 22, 2003


He makes dildos. Electric ones.


My commute home last Thursday. Photos.

From my screen, she tells me "Go home, Kevin. You look peaked."



Young love.



"And at the fall of night, the city's made of light"



Plastic look.



BARBELITH COMMANDS OBEDIENCE. (It's OK if you don't get the reference.)



Beneath the feet of the city.



Mind the gap.



Black and white boogie shoes.



Rest.


I have the plague. It's raging inside of me, desiring an exit so it may infect all of you. I had to come into work today, but will be leaving early to dose up on fine medicines and enjoy some rest, which I've been informed should help this whole thing go away. FYI: my uvula now weighs eight pounds.

Thursday, September 18, 2003




He has an angle-grinder and is seeking justice.



(Thanks to Vylar for pointing that out.)

Hooray! From The Official Pet Shop Boys Site. It never rains but it pours, eh?

PopArt: full details - 17 September '03
24 Parlophone/EMI will release internationally a double-CD of Pet Shop Boys' hits: "PopArt". Since 1985, Pet Shop Boys have had 33 Top 20 hits in the UK and they will all be included on "PopArt" plus two new tracks: Miracles", the forthcoming new single, and "Flamboyant", a new song.

"Flamboyant" was written and recorded by Neil and Chris during the summer and recently mixed with additional production by Tomcraft.

The songs are split between the two discs as either "Pop" or "Art", a decision made by Neil and Chris (which will no doubt prove controversial).

A limited edition of "PopArt" will be made available, including a third CD, "Mix", which is Neil and Chris's choice of their favourite PSB remixes.

The artwork for "PopArt" was designed by Farrow.
Full track-listing is as follows

POP
1. Go West
2. Suburbia (video edit)
3. Se a vida e
4. What have I done to deserve this?
5. Always on my mind
6. I wouldn't normally do this kind of thing
7. Home and dry
8. Heart
9. Miracles
10. Love comes quickly
11. It's a sin
12. Domino dancing
13. Before
14. New York City boy (U.S. radio edit)
15. It's alright
16. Where the streets have no name (I can't take my eyes off you)
17. A red letter day

ART
1. Left to my own devices
2. I don't know what you want but I can't give it any more
3. Flamboyant
4. Being boring
5. Can you forgive her?
6. West End girls
7. I get along (radio edit)
8. So hard
9. Rent
10. Jealousy
11. DJ culture
12. You only tell me you love me when you're drunk
13. Liberation
14. Paninaro '95
15. Opportunities (Let's make lots of money)
16. Yesterday, when I was mad
17. Single-Bilingual
18. Somewhere

MIX
1. Can you forgive her? (Rollo mix)
2. So Hard (David Morales Red Zone mix)
3. What have I done to deserve this? (Shep Pettibone mix)
4. West End girls (Sasha mix)
5. Miserablism (Moby Electro mix)
6. Before (Danny Tenaglia Classic Paradise mix)
7. I don't know what you want but I can't give it any more (Peter Rauhoffer New York mix)
8. New York City boy (Lange mix)
9. Young offender (Jam and Spoon Trip-o-matic Fairytale mix)
10. Love comes quickly (Blank and Jones mix)

The U.S. release date for "PopArt" has not been decided yet.


Miracles happen in November - 17 September '03

Pet Shop Boys will release their first single for well over a year in early November. The song is "Miracles" and was produced by and cowritten with Adam F and Dan Fresh. Neil describes it as: "very beautiful, very electronic". Strings for the track were arranged by Anne Dudley. Bonus tracks on the CD1 release are: "We're the Pet Shop Boys", their cover version of a song by My Robot Friend, and "Transparent". Remixes of "Miracles" are being worked on now.
You'll be able to hear "Miracles" on this site very soon.

Wednesday, September 17, 2003



OK, cold medicine? Makes me stoned. Makes me dazed. Makes me move my mouse back and forth on the screen for ten to fifteen minutes and find it amusing.

Cold medicine may clear out my sinuses and make me able to breathe, but it is a bitch. A bitch I've come to love. I crave this feeling now.

Fuck heroin. Give me CVS's own-brand Cold and Sinus medication with analgesic.

Tuesday, September 16, 2003


A sudden memory hit me this morning - do you remember when parents were less concerned for our safety? Seriously, now. This popped into my head when I recalled that my parents used to fit 6 people into a 1982 Volkswagen Rabbit. Here's the configuration:

Mom and Dad
Grown-up Passengers
Children

Now, there was no third bench seat in the Rabbit.

There was, however, a hatchback trunk that could easily fit two five year olds, if they promised not to play rough.

This means, of course, that if there had been a collision from the rear, there'd be Kevin Paste spread over a large portion of the south's highways and byways.

Now I see kids with their complex child seats until they're age 11 or something and wonder how I ever made it. How I survived falling off the monkey bars. How I survived creeks full of leeches and crawfish. How I survived anything.

Says it all, really.

Monday, September 15, 2003


"In this sequence, when I bend back, I get kicked in the solar plexus and fall onto the edge of that table," Jackie explains. "We shot this kicking sequence twenty times so twenty times I got kicked in the solar plexus, but what really hurt was this, the last take. I smashed my lower back on the table's edge." Even though the scene is well done, I find it hard to watch. In the next scene, Jackie is accidentally set on fire ("I didn't think the fire would spread so quickly" he mused), and he shows me where his hair and body were singed. "Even if someone gets hurt in a shot in Hong Kong we can still use that scene; I know you can't do that in America." The next few shots show Jackie falling down a set of stairs: "The stairs are rubber, didn't hurt ... much."

Jackie Chan, despite making shitty Hollywood movies of late, still kicks so much ass.

Warren loves me. OK, he loves all his puny humans, but I'm sure he loves me the most.

So, yeah. I like beer. So does Kristin. Only her photo gets big. The rest, eh, do you need to see me supersized?






Saturday, September 13, 2003



101 ON DVD. Fuck yeah.

Biznotic from the New Order and Underworld forums was kind enough to ensure that I received a copy of the "pre-mix" for Get Ready and New Order's gig at Roskilde from last year. I think I'd prefer if Get Ready had been released in something closer to this rougher cut format instead of getting a pop shine from Steve Osbourne. Interestingly, "Player In The League" (which later became a b-side to "60 Miles Per Hour") and a song I'd not heard before (trying to find the name now, to no avail) are also featured and "Crystal" has a bass solo from Hooky that should have been on the album version. Nice stuff.

Friday, September 12, 2003



My computer @ work.


I could listen to "Bad Cover Version" by Pulp for days.

It's like a later Tom and Jerry
When the two of them could talk
Like the Stones since the 80s
Like the last days of Southfork
Like Planet of the Apes on TV
The second side of 'Til The Band Comes In
Like an own-brand box of cornflakes
He's gonna let you down, my friend

As you know, Johnny Cash is dead. It's impossible to overstate his influence on modern music.

That's why I want to punch the people who use a frowny-face emoticon to express their dismay. He deserves more dignified mourning, you gits.

Thursday, September 11, 2003


My past decides to embarass me.

BeaucoupKevin: The Jedi Book?
BeaucoupKevin: OH YEAH.
anonymouspastperson: you have an inscription
BeaucoupKevin: Shit.
BeaucoupKevin: What does it say?
anonymouspastperson: hang on lemme find it
anonymouspastperson: i found it the other day and laughed
anonymouspastperson: Star Wars, Adventures in ABC
anonymouspastperson: ok this is long, typing in segments
anonymouspastperson: The author would like to thank all at LucasFilm, especially George lucas himself, for his vision and creation of what should be considered the greatest modern myth
anonymouspastperson: The translator of this work would also like to thank NAME REMOVED yadda yadda
anonymouspastperson: Props go out to yadda yadda and all the other Raverjedis out there.
anonymouspastperson: now's the part that made me chuckle
anonymouspastperson: The force will be with us as long as we hear the beat and live by what it's saying to us. Unless it's gabber, then we'd all be subjugated to the dark side.



So, officer Carl Pilgrim of the Cambridge PD is a good friend of mine. A while back, he was hit by a cab while arresting a suspect. I finally saw him at the shop last night and, well, let's go to the film...

I don't know if his doctor would approve, but Carl took himself off prescription painkillers a while back. Now he's OTC, baby



He's a little crazy about toys. Just a little.






Such the happy couple. Yes, that's the massive book about Star Wars toys that Steve Sansweet did a while back.





Aaron's down with the street.

Wednesday, September 10, 2003


HighSchoolJenn is now my favorite. This was her (belated, but worth it) Birthday Present to me.




FUCK COMMUNISM.

The other day, I went to the park and chilled for a bit while the sun started to set. Here's some pictures.




















Saw this on my way to get coffee this morning.


Pet Monkey For Sale - Primates For Sale. Well, I know where my money's going. Fuck the war, I want me a monkey!

Tuesday, September 09, 2003


According to the US Census Population Count site, there's 292,025,610 people in this country. Bush is wanting $87,000,000,000 to "help stabilize Iraq further and fight terror," right? So, he's wanting everyone (even the kid that just popped out of mama) to fork over $297.92 each to make things A-OK #1 GO TEAM USA in the region.

Oh, fuck him. I've got like $4 in my wallet and the bank account is earmarked for food, shelter, clothing, and disco.


Man, Wilco's Yankee Hotel Foxtrot is beautiful stuff. I feel like such an ass for being suspicious when I heard someone descibe them as "Radiohead doing country, but good." I listened to the record at least three times last night while lying in bed, the tiny earbuds filling my head up with widescreen poetry. I'm suspiciously happy of late.

Kristin gets back tonight. The wine has been selected, a nice Cab Sauv (none of that Arbor Mist shit, thank you) from Koala Creek. The menu has been planned - probably pizza; we've not devoured a couple of slices together in a week and that's forever for us. And maybe we'll get around to celebrating our five-year anniversary properly since cruel fate intervened the weekend of.

Cheer up, honey, I hope you can
There is something wrong with me
My mind is filled with silvery stars
Honey, kisses, clouds of fog
Shoulders shrugging off

Cheer up, honey, I hope you can
There is something wrong wit h me
My mind is filled with radio cures
Electronic surgical words

Picking apples for kings and queens of things I have never seen
Oh, distance has no way of making love understandable

Cheer up, honey, I hope you can
There is something wrong with me
My mind is filled with silvery stars
Honey, kisses, clouds of fog

Picking apples for the kings and queens of things I've never seen
Oh, distance has no way of making love understandable
Oh, distance has no way of making love understandable
Oh, distance has no way of making love understandable
Oh, distance the way of making love understandable
Oh, distance the way of making love understandable

Cheer up honey, I hope you can...

"We did a survey recently of both adults and young people and were able to identify two groups of downloaders," said Mr. Bernoff of Forrester. "One that reduced their CD purchases and one that didn't."

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

"We recently identified two sorts of people, living and dead."
"We recently identified two types of tortillas, corn and flour."
"We recently identified two types of ninjas, good and bad."
"We recently identified two types of music, country and western."

Monday, September 08, 2003


This is one of the regulars at the shop. Gollum wants what she has. Precious!




Aaron's the "real" part-timer at the shop. I just show up when he's not able to do his duties. You know, like when he runs off to Chicago for the summer to be with his hot girl. Wanker.




He's at the shop pretty often. He has a massive head and likes to leave his money lying around. He's adorable, isn't he?




I was reading comics when college posse stopped to talk to me. One of them took my picture because she wanted to play with my camera.



Tufts does its Dump And Run thrift sale once a year. I'd heard it was good. Sadly, it was not.






Here's some pictures of flowers. (I know. I kept trying to take pictures of bees, but the little bastards won't hold still for me.) Some of them get clickybig.





















Friday, September 05, 2003


You are The Cap'n!



Some men are born great, some achieve greatness and some slit the throats of any man that stands between them and the mantle of power. You never met a man you couldn't eviscerate. Not that mindless violence is the only avenue open to you - but why take an avenue when you have complete freeway access? You are the definitive Man of Action. You are James Bond in a blousy shirt and drawstring-fly pants. Your swash was buckled long ago and you have never been so sure of anything in your life as in your ability to bend everyone to your will. You will call anyone out and cut off their head if they show any sign of taking you on or backing down. You cannot be saddled with tedious underlings, but if one of your lieutenants shows an overly developed sense of ambition he may find more suitable accommodations in Davy Jones' locker. That is, of course, IF you notice him. You tend to be self absorbed - a weakness that may keep you from seeing enemies where they are and imagining them where they are not.




What's Yer Inner Pirate?
brought to you by The Official Talk Like A Pirate Web Site. Arrrrr!



In the middle of the night, I awoke with a charley horse. It was about three AM. I started screaming, of course, because I assumed someone was lopping off my leg with a dull axe. (Sensible, really. Have you ever had a charley horse?)

I am still limping today. Gah.

Yesterday, I started idly planning a CD with HighSchoolJenn. It was roughly designed as a "break-up" CD. Music you'd hear during a breakup during our teen years plus some newer things that I've come across ("Bad Cover Version" by Pulp being on that list) that would suit the mood well. It's put me in a funk, so now I'm designing the Happy New Love CD that'll be all poptastic and happy. Tracklisting will occur once she gets her copies.

Thursday, September 04, 2003



HighSchoolJenn asked me about Underworld. Oh, the girl had no idea what she was getting into. Here's what I wrote.

Here's the brief on Underworld. They started off as crap and added Darren Emerson to their lineup to eclipse Depeche Mode in the "my favorite band" category with their release Dubnobasswithmyheadman. This record took things I liked - electronic rhythms, stream of conciousness lyrics from Karl Hyde, and production (mostly by Rick Smith) that never strayed from beyond excellent and put them together, causing much orgasming in my truck whilst I tootled around in 1994. (The track "Dirty Epic" on your CDs is from that album.) They followed up with Second Toughest In The Infants, a harder album that explored more and more electronic territory and jumping genres with ease.

Then, it happened. The song. The one Underworld song everyone knows. "Born Slippy" was a single that came out between the two albums and while it got Mixmag's "Tune Of The Week" award, it didn't do much business in the charts. It was a heavily-remixed b-side version (with vocals) that was attached to Danny Boyle's adaptation of Irvine Welsh's novel Trainspotting that exploded. Pete Tong seized it and played it every week on his top-rated BBC dance program until JBO re-released the ".nuxx" version as a single in its own right. DJs played it. Radio loved it. Football hooligans sang the "Lager, lager, lager" chorus. It hit #2 in the charts. Pretty good for a band whose big step into electronic music was an ambient remix of a dodgy Simply Red tune.

1998 brought Beaucoup Fish and even more album sales. In some places more sedate that Second Toughest, this album proved that Underworld knew exactly what they were doing, better than anyone else out there. A massive tour ensued, documented on the album and DVD Everything, Everything in which the band proved that techno can be live and it can kick your puny ass. It also marked the departure of Darren Emerson, who left to pursue his DJ career and run his own label, Underwater. Last year, A Hundred Days Off came out. The first album by the core duo of Smith and Hyde, it was received well and managed to garner a few critical raspberries for just being excellent instead of unexcelled. This year sees the release of the anthology mentioned in my blog and, hopefully, a new album being recorded.

I don't talk about work at Merchant Warehouse much. It's nice. I like it. But then there's days when shit like this crosses my desk as a lead:

Business Name: art business
Legal Name: Same
Principal Owner: ikediuwa clinton
Title: clinton's art
Real Name: clinton c ikediuwa
Email: mcblondedormain@epals.com
Business Address: 20 douglas road owerri,imo state,Nigeria
City: owerri
State: IMO STATE,NIGERIA.
Zip: 234
Day Phone:
Business Fax:
Product: manmade art
Business Age: 1
Retail Percent:
Phone Percent:
Accept Visa: No
Processor:
Volume:
Average Sale:
Comments: please I will like to get a free credit account

Amazing, how bitter I can actually be. Ya'll best stay on my good side. I'll be in the corner, listening to Nine Inch Nails on my headphones and flipping you off like a surly babboon.

Wednesday, September 03, 2003



Kristin wants us to buy this place. As I have no cash, this makes things easy. "No."

Still, it's cute.



So, I'm broke. Flat busted. There's a bit in the bank account, but that's for important things like smack and booze. I'm in the kitchen this morning and I eye the large series of milk bottles that have been holding my change for the last few months. "Hey! I can take those to the CoinStar machine at the Star Market and get real money for all those shiny pieces of metal!" I announce to the empty apartment. (Kristin's on Cape Cod, again.)

I then dump all the various containers into a nice, strong ZipLock brand sealable bag and trot down to the grocery store just to have the jackass in front of me make the machine smoke, cough, and die because he put in about eighteen thousand coins at once. Now, this left me carrying about a gallon of pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters (I also suspect several Chuck E Cheese tokens are in the mix) that I ended up lugging to work with me. They're sitting under my desk now. Hopefully, it'll be fixed when I head home, else I will feel like a complete ass.