So, “our” president1 managed to sign yet another hypocritical piece of legislation today, this time allowing companies espousing so-called “family values” to go and alter Hollywood content for home distribution. That’s right – if Little Johnny’s mama doesn’t want him to see a nipple because fuck knows his eyes will explode and the bloodlust will fill him to the point of creating a being that feeds off rape and murder, they can now get that taken care of with a few clicks of the mouse. Normally, I’d be all for this – it happens in the home, lets parents control what their kids watch, whatever. Fine, fine, fine, take out the bloody parts of Gladiator and make it so the rave scene in The Matrix Reloaded looks like a Girl Scout Jamboree, but don’t be surprised when he’s knocked up Peggy Sue after the Fall Formal, as abstinence “education” doesn’t work one goddamn bit. Honestly, I don’t give two tugs of a dead dog’s cock what these wingnuts do in their own home, just like they shouldn’t care that I’m current getting fellated by Javier, my man-slave2.
What pisses me the holy goddamn fuck off over this is the fact that this administration is letting loony right wing “Christians” run roughshod over the media companies because they’re flying the flag of “moral issues,” defacing work that’s been toiled over by tons of people while at the same time ruining CD art with warnings that strongly imply that my ass is getting tossed into the clink if I decide to go and share a few songs with my friends. They assist crazy-ass organizations like the MPAA and the RIAA in their anti-piracy efforts that reduce what I can do with content that I pay for fair and square while bending over backwards to service a crazy-as-fuck minority that happens to squawk a lot and threaten my tail with a couple of weeks in pound-me-in-the-pooper prison if I engage in any “unauthorized copying?”
Jesus, add in the fact that they’re fucking with my Social Security while Bill Frist runs some sort of exorcism against filibusters, and Tom Delay runs like Vin Diesel escaping a fireball when questions about ethics comes up and you’ve got enough to give a man an high-quality embolism that would make make samurai movie fans gush with praise when they see the end result.
What the hell, guys? Are you that determined to get some that you’re just going to fuck everything? At least Clinton restricted his fucking to the Oval Office and it was purely consensual.
1I didn’t vote for the fucker, the sane and/or intelligent people I know can’t imagine voting for the fucker, only an additional 3% of Americans apparently voted for the fucker with the key electoral flop happening in Ohio, home of a voting machine company whose CEO promised to delivery the state to the fucker. In case you can’t tell, not really a fan of him in these here parts. No, I don’t hate America. Fuck you for thinking that.
2This is a vicious lie. His name is Eduardo. He’s lovely.