You see that panel right there? That’s State’s Evidence Number 1 in the case of BeaucoupKevin.com versus The X-Men. Stan Lee, despite being married to his wife Joanie since the Boxer Rebellion, apparently never spoke to her or any other female during his time as Marvel’s main writer. If so, there probably would have been half as many thought balloons filled with half as many words describing Jean’s feelings for Scott. I mean, this makes Carol Ferris mooning over Green Lantern look like a finely-nuanced Merchant-Ivory production.

I’m glad Stan left the title when he got too busy. Heaven knows how far he would have gone with this sort of thing…

Scene: The X-Men sitting around the dinner table at the mansion.

Scott (scowling more than usual): This salad needs something.

Beast (passing a bottle of Hidden Valley with his feet): Does our fearless leader require some extra dressing?

Iceman (making ice cubes): Stop showing off, Hank! Now, maybe I can cool it down a bit with these?

Jean Grey (thought balloon): Oh, Scott! I know what you need! You need croutons or bacon bits but I can never reveal that you need something crunchy in your salad because you’d suspect how I really feel about you! Oh, the strain of leadership rests heavily on your beautifully furrowed brow and you’d never have time for us to be a real couple! I’m going to go back to my room and carve your name into my arm again…

(Also, is it just me or does Scott look like he’s about 45 in these stories? I mean, I love Jack’s art, but…)