My one moment of excitement this morning has failed to materialize as promised.

However, I was able to read an interview with Jeph Loeb while waiting for the phones to start ringing.

Waiting for the phones always reminds me of the overlooked Mel Gibson film Gallipoli – all of us sitting here, quiet, either working on emails from customers or reading and trying not to jump when they hear the “beep” in their headset. With the number of customers we have, we’re always waiting for the great flood – some small screw up in their accounts that gives them the one reason to call us up, screaming bloody murder and wanting the souls of our ancestors as payment for their wasted time.

So, they’ve asked me to do some writing.

Scripting, in fact.

For outbound calls promoting an aspect of our service.

I have the feeling I’m going to be handed this team of people and expected to call perfect strangers.

That ain’t going over well in the ‘burbs, I tell you.

1/2 day yesterday – was sent him early due to lack of work.

Somebody in our marketing department is trying to sell a pair of “sofa’s” – I certainly hope they are more careful when doing print for the site.

Loud Bruce is still bugging the living fuck out of me.

No news to report from the work front – they named two people Spirit Award winners at the Monday meeting and I worked on Saturday.

It’s fucking cold.

Kevin plays Bad Mobile DJ with his Minidisc deck:

Stop! – Erasure

The Different Story (A World of Lust and Crime) – Peter Schilling

Speed (Hardcore Mix) – Alpha Team

Doctor Jones – Aqua

I Feel It (Invisible Brothers Radio Edit) – Moby

U R The Best Thing (Perfecto Mix) – D:Ream

Sex-N-Drugs & Rock-N-Roll – Mantronix

Nomansland (David’s Song) (Radio Edit) – DJ Sakin & Friends

The Lover That You Area (Radio Edit) – Pulse (H1 \/01\/0d!)

What’s On Your Mind (Pure Energy) – Information Society

Never Give Up On The Good Times – Spice Girls

I Know Where It’s At – All Saints

Candy Girl – New Edition

Holiday – Madonna

Temple of Dreams – Messiah

Living In Oblivion – Anything Box

It’s Over Now – Cause & Effect

I Beg Your Pardon (I Never Promised You A Rose Garden) – Kon-Kan

Work related:

Slow. Slow like a dead turtle going uphill with a headwind.

The following 6 reps have been chosen to attend the Patriots parade.

Cleo X 11:30-3

Dave X 11:30-3

Amanda X 11:30-3

Ryan X Full Day

Chris X 11:30-3

Brendan X 11:30-3

KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

“MY NAME IS LOUD BRUCE AND I AM THE BIGGEST IDIOT EVER.”

I’d pay $50 to hear that right before he gets electrocuted.

Disney fans scare me.

A parade is not a good reason to call in to work.

I could really go for a beer.

Happy monday.

Our “B-roll” is going to be filmed here in a bit. A b-roll is what CNN, CNBC, and FOX News (ha!) use as video whenever someone is talking about the company. We’ve been told to look our best and get ready for our closeup.

I really think an obscene gesture to the masses would be the best option here.

Jean looks like she’s about to bust a move against King Disco Rat in the breakdancing finals.

Too bad she doesn’t know that he’s much better at the robot, which has been her biggest weakness.

Today, I have to call two fools who believe that we should give them some money. As they are not currently members of the service and have not signed up for any programs, it’s quite impossible for us to give them contributions, as we’ve not place to put them. They’re both in Louisiana, which provides me with more data for my hypothesis.

The hypothesis is quite simple and, as a child of the south, I feel I can say this – those damned people don’t read a goddamn thing properly before flying off the handle and deciding they’ve been wronged. Christ on a crutch, we are helping you people FREE MONEY, you might have to WORK A SMALL AMOUNT to get it.

And I just hung up with this complete and utter cheesehead who thought he deserved money without, you know, saying he wanted it. (He never registered, blah blah blah.) This is the third in a day. I don’t know if not owning a gun is an option anymore. I’d love to be able to just blow my brains out after some of these calls, as it doesn’t seem worth it. Of course, when I’m right and all, it feels really great.

On the flipside, when I get a call and I hear the kid in the background and the parent’s all excited about the service, I suppose that makes it all worthwhile.