A YEAR OF GIVEAWAYS: Elephantmen Volume One
32 Comments | Posted: February 22nd, 2010 | Filed under: Contests
Last week’s prize of the first three volumes of The Immortal Iron Fist was won by Scwonkey Dog creator Jonathan Switzer, so let’s all give him a polite round of applause even if we feel we should have won in our hearts. Thanks for entering, everyone, but there’s only one winner (unless some publisher/company wants to shell out for multiple prizes. Hint!)
This week, I’ve got a copy of the first Elephantmen trade paperback to give away, Wounded Animals. Elephantmen is a surprisingly nuanced, frequently thought-provoking look at genetic manipulation in the future. The reviews that compare it to Blade Runner are not far off and it’s one of my favorite recent comics discoveries. (I got a copy of the hardcover from creator Richard Starkings at San Diego, hence having a spare lying around.)
TO ENTER: comment with what animal you’d least like to wake up in the body of. Enter before 12:01AM EST on Saturday, February 27 to qualify for the draw. The winner is determined using the Random.org number generator.
Terms And Conditions?
Please note that because of shipping costs, this contest is for residents of the United States of America and Canada. You must leave your email address with your comment to qualify, as I’m not going to spend any time hunting down someone who didn’t want to be contacted about their amazing prize. One comment per person and yes, I will know if you cheat and will probably mock you in public.

A cockroach. Read The Metamorphosis in High School and that shit fucked me up.
A monkey. Specifically, a monkid. Humiliation apparently knows no limits for lower hominids.
A tapeworm. Seriously.
Also, I love Elephantmen! Pick me! Pick me!
Rosie O’Donnell’s horse.
A sloth, because I would hate to just hang out and move slow all the time.
A fly. Or Jeff Goldblum.
On a related note, do not EVER show Cronenberg’s The Fly yo a child. It leaves deep scars.
I wouldn’t want to wake up as a horseshoe crab, because I’d hate hanging out with all the other horseshoe crabs while they talk about how long their lineage’s are.
“My great-great-great-grand uncle was a Georgia Horseshoe Crab of the the Limulidae family of Horseshoe Crabs and fought on the side of the Rebels in aught four—”
Oh, shut up, already!
A turtle — I often sleep on my back.
I’d prefer not to wake up as a hagfish.
Me too! I’d rather not wake up as a hagfish. I already have a nasty head-cold, so at this time waking up as a creature whose scientific name translates to “Mucous-y mucous” does not appeal.
Blobfish… nobody wants to be both sad looking and ugly looking by deafault http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blobfish
Also, endagered.
a snake, got to have my arms and legs mind you…
One of Octomom’s children.
I’d least like to wake up one day in the body of a Dodo because then I’d be extinct.
A pigeon-rat. Sure, you can fly AND crawl, but you’re a pigeon-rat!
I’m going to have to say I would not enjoy waking up to discover I had become a Candiru — otherwise knows as the Urethra-Invading Fish.
A platypus. Nature’s joke.
I’m going to second horse-shoe crab. There’s nothing creepier than a desolate beach full of horse-shoe crabs. Ick.
A naked mole-rat. First off, you’re naked. And blind. And all pink and hairless, and you have to eat dirt and stuff…and quite frankly I have enough problems.
A chicken, most likely. I’m rather attached to my head, you see…
A Chihuahua. Every day would be an unending humiliation.
A turkey vulture. In addition to eating dead stuff, a turkey vulture has to piss and shit on itself in order to cool its body down. Which proves my hypothesis that nature is weird and gross.
Easy – either a hyperkinetic rabbity thing or a lagomorph. Your choice.
Armadillo. Ugly, smelly creatures that end up on the shoulder of far too many Texas highways.
lobster
I would not like to wake up as an Aye-aye. Those things are creepy lookin’. I couldn’t stand to look at myself in the mirror.
Giant tree sloth, or any insect. Life with a jaw is kind of terrifying.
Probably that south american fish that swims up people’s peeholes. hell of a way to make a living.
A cow. People might cut a hole in my side to see what’s going on in my stomachs and then plug it up and pull it out whenever. Then, after that humiliation, some aliens might come along and cut out my reproductive organs. WTF? Do they transplant those things onto other beings? If so, get me a horse cock!
I would rather not be a jellyfish.
A centipede. Too many damn legs.
I’d like to wake up as a koala and get loaded on eucalyptus leaves all day.