CONTEST: Win a copy of Lamar Abrams’ REMAKE!
20 Comments | Posted: June 23rd, 2009 | Filed under: Contests | Tags: adhouse, lamar abrams, remake
One of my favorite books picked up from this year’s MoCCA is Lamar Abrams’s slacker superhero romp Remake. In it, Max Guy makes friends, eats bread pudding, and uses his Max Blaster to change things into stuff:

Remake is funny, fast-paced, and lovingly-made parody of genre conventions in both video games and comic books, and I’ve got an extra copy to give away. To win a copy for yourself, just comment below and tell me what you would do with a Max Blaster of your own: what everyday subject would you turn into another thing and why? For example “I would turn my neighbor’s yapping dog into Jenny McCarthy because she deserves to be on a chain for spreading that malarky about autism and vaccines!” This will run through Friday, June 26 at 11:59PM.

I would turn the tree in my back yard into a Money Tree so that raking would be more enjoyable.
I would turn all of my unwanted X-Men comic books from the past few years (which have been utter trash & for the life of me I don’t know why I kept reading them for so long) back into the trees they came from because we all know the world can always use more.
Uh… How appropriate and family friendly must the responses be?
Let’s not shock just to shock, but I basically assume my readership can see naughty words.
I’d turn all of my students into great writers. I decided against shooting my own cock to make it into a bigger cock since that’s so typical a response, hence the earlier query.
I would turn Indiana into Rhode Island so it would take me a LOT less time to travel across the state to get to my girlfriend in Chicago.
I would turn Jeph Loeb into Kate Beaton — hopefully transforming panels upon panels of out-of-context gore (the Blog EATS the Wasp? Really?!) turn into cozy historical larfs (the Blob eats cookies! With Napoleon!)
I would zap all the copies of whatever new-age feelgood book Oprah has most recently recommended and replace the contents with a mind-expanding work of substance, while keeping the cover and O-seal of approval intact. Of course, in comparison “Goodnight Moon” would be an improvement.
I would turn myself into a person with a good job who gets writing projects finished, instead of just sitting around, getting fatter, and reading comics. Oh, look, a contest to win comics!
I would turn George W. Bush into a toilet at a BBQ restaurant in Texas where the special every Sunday is all-you-can-eat extra spicy chili.
I would turn my “Buck Rogers in the 25th Century” DVD set into a “Batman: The Complete Live-Action Series” DVD set. (Full disclosure: I would turn pretty much anything I own into a “Batman: The Complete Live-Action Series” DVD set.)
I would just disintigrate things that make me unhappy and replace them with beers. I could drink lots more beer that way.
I would zap my son into that cleaning machine in The Cat in the Hat so he can pick after himself. Though I would hope he changes back not like that dog that turned into shoes. If I was a guy, I would turn my regular sized right hand into a giant, huge hand so it will finally fit around my ENORMOUS penis.
I think I’d use the gadget to create that library from Dylan Horrocks’ “Hicksville,” ’cause wouldn’t it be cool to have a library with copies of EVERY comic ever published? I might expand it to also include lost film classics (i.e. “London After Midnight”). Oh, if I have to create it out of something, how ’bout the Mall of America? Would anyone really miss that?
I would turn half the world’s nuclear warheads into chocolate and the other half into peanut butter. Two great tastes that great together.
Whoops, should obviously be “that TASTE great together” at the end there.
I would turn Jack Kirby’s grave into a 35 year old Jack Kirby, so he could reinvent comics yet again! (I’d also turn Roz Kirby’s grave into a 35 year old Roz since, well, it’s Roz!)
I would use a Max Blaster to turn my husband into my husband with a futuristic robotic colon that never causes him any more suffering and then I would turn all the empty boxes from our move into pecan pies and then I would turn that cd player that doesn’t work anymore into a perfect clone of my sister who would babysit our kids while my husband ate pecan pie for the first time since getting sick and then we’d have lots of sex.
Oh, also blast the stuff in landfills into healthy food and AIDS vaccines for other people. They can get their own damn pies.
Color me curious… who won?
Nathan won! He is a winner!