So, this one time, I had a webcomic that I aborted.

OK, so a few weeks ago I had one of those brainstorms that occasionally happens when I’ve been seriously caffeinating and thankfully, I was in touch with my frequent partner on things writerly Josh, who agreed to draw it. We were going to do a series of (let’s call them) tributes to the great adventure strips of the 30s and 40s except, instead of featuring Dirk Chinley or Roger Handsome, we’d use a man who’s always innovated, fought for what he believed was right, made women tremble just so, and most importantly, dressed amazingly.

I was going to write a webcomic about Prince as a CIA agent in the 80s. Morris Day was going to be his Felix Leiter. Prince would only speak in lyrics to his own songs. It was going to be a black-and-white comic that was spot-colored purple. It was going to be a loving genre pastiche that served as an appreciative, humorous panegyric to a musician I held no small amount of respect and awe for.

Then, he said this:

Recently, Prince hosted an executive who works for Philip Anschutz, the Christian businessman whose company owns the Staples Center. “We started talking red and blue,” Prince said. “People with money—money like that—are not affected by the stock market, and they’re not freaking out over anything. They’re just watching. So here’s how it is: you’ve got the Republicans, and basically they want to live according to this.” He pointed to a Bible. “But there’s the problem of interpretation, and you’ve got some churches, some people, basically doing things and saying it comes from here, but it doesn’t. And then on the opposite end of the spectrum you’ve got blue, you’ve got the Democrats, and they’re, like, ‘You can do whatever you want.’ Gay marriage, whatever. But neither of them is right.”

When asked about his perspective on social issues—gay marriage, abortion—Prince tapped his Bible and said, “God came to earth and saw people sticking it wherever and doing it with whatever, and he just cleared it all out. He was, like, ‘Enough.’ “

And, well, that was that, then. We shut it down. I’m pretty sure I’m not going to give any more money to him as well. If he can be judgmental about things like basic human rights, then I can be judgmental about how I spend my money and energy.

He probably would have sued our asses off anyway, huh?

(Yes, I’ve heard that someone in his camp told Perez Hilton that he was misquoted, but forgive me for believing The New Yorker over that twat, at least for now.)